Hi Paula,

Thanks for your question! Kudos to you for deciding to take care of these kitties and make them part of your family. This is a common problem in multi-cat households, so you are certainly not alone. First, I assume these kitties are spayed/neutered already because of their ages, but a reminder to any cat owners that spaying and neutering is important for preventing some unwanted or aggressive behaviors.

It sounds like Murray is quite the shy cat, while Oliver is the more confident one. It is important that you maintain a “safe space” for Murray so he can get away and relax on his own without having to worry about the other cat. Also, I like that you have provided multiple litter boxes in different locations. There is a general rule of thumb that says you should have one more box than cats in the house. So, in your case, it would be four if possible. I also suggest feeding the cats in separate areas – this way they will not feel the stress of competition during mealtimes.

There are also some pheromone products that help to calm cats and encourage them to accept changes in the environment. Your veterinarian can guide you further on these products. Another tip I have would be to take things slow, and as you said, do not expect them to like each other, rather, the goal should be for them to tolerate one another. Allow them short periods of access or interaction with one another, and if they do well, consider giving them a treat as a reward for a calm interaction. This might be as simple as sitting apart quietly in the same room.

You may also consider having a behavior consult. There are veterinarians that specialize in behavior issues, including inter-cat aggression. They will be able to develop a plan to ease the interactions between your cats.

Wishing you all the best!

Dr. Kim Hester